Violence

I don't understand my oldest child's fears? He is always angry about nothing.Today he punched a wall.Again.This time the wall was concrete.Maybe its broken but I doubt it.
What was it this time? Well he has to go to a school dance.It is mandatory.By me not the school.He gets a upgrade in the school points system and he needs all the help he can get.Not that he doesn't try.This boy tries so hard to do well it is saddening sometimes .And the other one sleeps all the time even in class and has good grades.Although i am on him to do more.But the oldest just stays angry.
What to do.
This school function is a dance so i do not understand.I know he is infatuated with girls.
Hes m15 by the way.
And to be able to up his grade by going to a dance is a gimme in my book.
Well i talk him down to calm every time.I don't know how since My dad left when I was 3 and started another family.
Where does it comes from ?Only God knows.And i pray each day my son will leave this demon out one day.He is such a good boy
Just full of anger

Depressed

Ever have one of those blah days?
Well for me today is that day.It turned out fine when I woke up but I felt different.I knew today was going to be a depressing day but not this low.Yes I'm not crazy its just that ever since my accident I tend to feel the weather changes coming ,the migraines and the depression.I have been keeping a daily diary and it needs to be updated.
I think i will start putting input of the weather just to see if my diagnoses is correct.Because the quacks i mean doctors don't seem to care.
I mean I go to them and then they ask the same boring questions and then when I talk they don't listen or say no one can feel the weather its a wives tail. Yeah right.
It did storm today and rained off and on.
Which is a good thing in the desert but I can't seem to break this depression mode .
Only when I sleep do I not feel it.I can't sleep all the time.
One day I would like to get up and be how I was before the accident.But now only i know I'm down I look the same and dress the same.And people still ignore me because hey I'm a scary looking guy to most.
Need someone to scare you ex I'm the guy.Need to get that friend away from you daughter or son?I'm the one.I did it once for a friend a long time ago.His 12 year old daughter was seeing a 18 year old.He couldn't talk with his daughter or convince her to stop.SO one day at his house he asked me to put the scare in this boy.
All i did was when the 2 came back to the house i just went up to the girl and hugged her which was normal and glared at him with a look that could kill.After being introduced as a close friend the daughter went to get a drink in the kitchen for here boyfriend.Well i used the time to lean over and say that i sure don't want to go to prison again for someone like him.
She complained to her dad the next day that her boyfriend dumped her for some unknown reason.Which gave him the opportunity to say "see I knew he was no good: after that she went back to her own age group never trusting older guys and always asking her parents for advice.

WHO's Afraid of ME?

It turns out that allot of people are.Its not that I'm mean its that I was born mean looking.I can walk into anyplace and people will become nervous.Ive been told by fellow workers that when they first met me they new I would murder them.I have always noticed that some will stay clear for awhile.It is only after a few months that people will start to be at ease with me.That is not the case with my family of course because they grew up around me and my wife is blind.
When my boys ask why there friends wont come over I have to explain that TV categorizes looks into good bad etc.
But its always the nice looking ones that are the worst. In my opinion.
If you need someone to come scare off an ex just hire me.I guarantee that they will back down and high tail it away.All I need is a meal and a cot.
Strange but little kids really like me .I was at the orphanage one day and there was a 4 year old just brought in.She wouldn't talk to anyone and would stay away from the other kids but the director took us in her room and she got out of bed and just came to me.I was in tears as she hugged me and called me papai.
I spent the 3 hours there playing with her and getting her to play with the other children.It was sad to go but i will never forget that little child.
The day is coming close to finish the adoption and I still don't have the funds to go.
Do you think ill make it there?
Leave a comment
If you want to adopt in Brazil let me know because I know more than the international people and they want all your money without care.
thanks for reading

TEN THINGS I LIKE

1.PEACHES
2.RAIN ON A TIN ROOF
3.PEOPLE THAT TALK TO ME
4.BEING NICE TO OTHERS
5.MY FAMILY
6.THE THINGS MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME
7.BEING ABLE TO FIX THINGS
8.COOKING FOR OTHERS
9.HAVING BEEN TO EXOTIC PLACES
10.THE CLOSENESS OF FRIENDS

VERY FUNNY

I just had to post this.How smart of the child to do this.